It's been a little bit of a crazy year...
I hope that I can continue to make at least monthly posts here, but I'm going to try for weekly,
It's Christmas time. That time of year that nearly drives me insane with all the "I want this" and "i want that!". I have no idea how mothers with multiple kids do it without having a migraine everyday. Today is decorating and Christmas tree day, so I've busted out the old inherited ornaments, plus my cheesy Walmart and dollar store ones and am on a mission to make this house Christmassy.
But first I'll procrastinate.
A friend if mine today was in a frenzied state over letting her 14 year old boy go to six flags with a few of his friends, admittedly I am not the mother of a fourteen year old,.. But I think back to the times when my mom let me "go do"... And honestly, while yes they were the most freeing times I can remember (apart from the day my ex left the state) I was also scared shitless some of the time. Always afraid of disappointing my parents with my actions; peer pressure; weirdos at the mall... You get where I'm going with this.
I always knew if I messed up, got in trouble, or something inappropriate happened, I'd never be let out again. My parents were strict on me due to some issues with my older siblings. So I always felt like the one that they were going to make sure they weren't going to screw up again on. No pressure there!
Things have turned in the way we raise our kids, that's evidently clear. Kids don't play in the street anymore, stay out past the street lights going on and I always feel like I'm suffocating my kid. When did this change exactly? I blame America's most wanted. I feel like that show was so pivotal in the 80's family household. We got to watch these criminals be caught for all these terrible indecencies and it burned into our brain, scared the crap out of our parents, and so then forever how we interact with our kids was forever changed. "Don't go outside, you might get kidnapped", "don't stay out to late, predators hide better in the dark", "don't get to close to the water, a shark will rip your legs off".
I have tried reallllllllllly hard to let jasmine have the freedom I did when I was a kid. I let her go ride her bike outside by herself. I let her go to friends houses in the complex by herself. I let her go on walks in the complex by herself. And until she if fails me in the sense of trusting her judgement and at least asking permission to do things, I will continue to let her grow her wings and be an independent little girl. It's one of her most endearing qualities, I think.
So it boils down to when jasmine is 14 and wants to go to six flags with her friends sans me,
I will say yes. Then stress out the entire day hoping that she thinks before a potentially bad decision is made by her and her peers... "Is this something mom would ground me for doing?" And if it is that she has the strength to walk away or even better yet, get at least one of those peers to walk away with her.
I think that my friends son, is of that caliber. Great Christian kid, the family's unit is strong, they are a level headed bunch of peeps, not easily swayed to make rash or spontaneous decisions.
Not like someone I know.... :p